“Wherefore it came to pass that my father, Lehi, as he went forth prayed unto the Lord, yea, even with all his heart, in behalf of his people. And it came to pass as he prayed unto the Lord, there came a pillar of fire and dwelt upon a rock before him; and he saw and heard much; and because of the things which he saw and heard he did quake and tremble exceedingly.” (1 Nephi 1:5-6)

 

These verses invited me to reflect on my intention when I kneel down to pray. To be honest, there are many nights that I struggle with prayer and even avoid it.
 
I love prayer journaling experiences when my communion with the heavens flows through writing. Inspiration also flows through pondering and communion time in the early waking hours. But at night it's different. When my body is weary, my soul is not as open to prayer, and my communion often feels one-sided and duty bound. 
 
Silly Emily. I let my narrative and old patterns limit me. It's a weakness I keep living.
 
I know if I am going to change a big narrative, I have to shift in a small Wise Woman way by rooting out this deceived belief and behavior pattern.
 
I must choose freedom over familiarity.
 
And it begins with the example of Lehi and his prayer. The profound change in his life trajectory, and actually the entire Book of Mormon story, happened because of this very prayer. Wow. That's a transformative realization.
 
He didn't just say a prayer. He prayed with all his heart. That's what's missing from my narrative and my night time connection with the Lord through prayer. Soulful prayer.
 
And I love how God responded to Lehi praying in this powerful way. God manifested himself to Lehi in a pillar of fire and inspired deep change. We don't always get to see and hear immediate, intense answers to our prayers like he did. I know that. I also know that if I'm going to show up more soulfully and pray not just with the words of my mind but by offering my whole heart, I will likely get a different outcome than I am now. And large changes can result from small shifts.
 
I know it. Now it's time to do it and write the different narrative with all my heart. 
 
What is your inner narrative about your personal prayer life?
 
How can you pray in a more soulfully aligned way--with body, Spirit, heart, and mind engaged?